The Sister Ask Story

Before we dig in to this and get deep – my Sister story is more than worth telling. In fact, you may not believe it true. But it is and I will start by saying: I met my full blood Sister for the very first time when I was fourteen.

Life is many things but in my world at least, it’s rarely simple. I’ll start at the beginning and try not to miss too much of the story. My Mummy was a girl of 15 who lied and said she was 17 and my Daddy was a young man who said he was free and was actually married with a son. Daddy said ‘hey baby, wanna ride on my bike?’ Mummy Ask said ‘how fast’. The met at the transcendental meditation centre. They were young and in love. She got pregnant, he left. She had unsupportive, conservative parents. She wanted to keep the baby. She took a job as a live in housekeeper, the man of house took advantage. She ended in a home for unmarried mothers. She DID NOT want to give up her child. She worked for her keep. She had that baby and specified it would go to a good, loving home.

She eventually married him and had me. She and he divorced when I was 7 for good reason. Life travelled, I grew up. My Daddy told me I had a Sister not long after the split but MADE ME KEEP it secret. So not fair, I thought (because I was told) Mummy Ask couldn’t stand the telling. So at thirteen I had a ride home with Mummy Ask that was so white knuckle (her feelings, not the driving) my heart nearly stopped. She asked if I knew that Daddy Ask had been looking for my Sister. I had to say, yes. The trust was gone, my keys to the house rescinded.

Days of discussion, development and dissolution. I never knew of the beginning that I am telling you. But this is where the story really picks up pace.

I spent a year talking with Mummy Ask, she did not want to spring from nowhere and disturb Sister Ask’s life. One  year of; what if she’s a punk, a mother, a business woman! But I kept saying I don’t care – she’s my Sister, I need to know and she said she’s my daughter I need her home.

It’s not easy to find an adopted child.

Mummy Ask called the governmental people, they said they’d sent the forms. The forms came on a Friday and sat on the hall table till Sunday. Mummy Ask edged them open with anticipation, then screamed out loud, then called me into the room. There was, indeed, a bunch of paperwork but there was also a note paper that said:

I have sent you the paperwork but you do not need to seek your daughter, she is seeking you.

So even though it was Sunday, even though the words seemed unbelievable (she asked me to pinch her at least three times) Mummy Ask rang the number. Someone answered. Strangely, it was the lady who wrote the note, doing overtime.  And that never had she seen in her career, two people (wishing to be reunited) cross her desk in the same day.

Through this channel, Mummy Ask got Sister Asks phone number. Remember here, I’d been fourteen for two minutes. Mummy Ask called my Sister for the first time when I wasn’t home. I came home, Mummy Ask told me all she knew – I was an Aunty and was about to be again and my Sister Ask lived in VIC (we were in SA). I called my Sister. It was much like Mummy Asks first call to my Sister – more crying than talking. I jumped in our swimming pool, full bomb and yelled ‘I’m an Aunty’.

Okay, this family meet and greet was not going down so sweet with everyone. Dear, now departed Gran was sorta a driving force behind the adoption in the first place and did I forget to mention that Mummy Ask is adopted too? Anyho, Mummy Ask was feeling pretty emotive (me too, me too, me too) so she called my Sister and asked ‘Would it be okay if I came to meet you, like tomorrow?’ Sister Ask practically screamed YES!

So Mummy Ask and my then stepdad (complete bastard, this was the one thing he did right) called in sick to work and in twelve ish hours we were driving up my Sisters driveway. Let me tell you this, Mummy Ask wasn’t going to run out of the car, she was going to be dignified.

My Sister was eight months preggers and ran down those exterior stairs like a life depended on it. Mummy Ask jumped out of the car while it was still driving. They ran, they hugged, it was bigger than the world and all the planets. I stood back but while Mummy Ask and Sister Ask hugged, my Sister and I shared a look. Not just a look but I am sure we both saw each others raw and naked soul.

And that’s how I met my full blown, full blood Sister at fourteen.